Who knows — maybe you’ll find your keys while you’re at it, too.
It’s a parenting conundrum as old as time itself.
Of course television and TV remote controls haven’t been around all that long, but the reactionary dynamic of the Missing Remote Control Epidemic has been a story both felt & told since the dawn of time.
Our ancestors faced it; from the loss of hieroglyphic writing rocks of the caveman, to the centuries later inkwells and quill pens in Ye Days of Olde — all have vanished at the hands of our pesky children.
The struggle has been real as the day is long: kids take and then misplace our easy access to entertainment.
Whether you've got a Roku, Apple TV or have yet to cut the cable cord: if you have kids running around the house, your remote control is probably not where it’s supposed to be right now. Is it? That’s right.
But that’s okay, I’m here to help because I, too, start shaking and sweating if I can’t access Netflix the second I want to plop down and watch the next episode of The OA.
Here are 9 spots you’re likely to find your remote, from deep down inside your daughter's rain boots, to the freezer ice cube tray, to the cat's food bowl (trust me, it’s…unpleasant).
1) Have you checked the refrigerator? Your remote is probably somewhere near the milk. Or the cheese sticks. But maybe in the crisper drawer because let’s be honest, no one knows what’s supposed to go in there anyway, it might as well be the TV remote.
2) Have you looked in the dryer or behind the dryer or under the dryer or wherever it is that lost socks go?
3) I agree, the sofa cushions seem too obvious. I mean sure, look under there too because who doesn't need 47 cents, a broken pencil, a handful of Goldfish and a grape. Eew gross, you haven't bought grapes in months.
4) Your daughter's polka dot rain boot, the right one (obviously, she can't find the left) that sits next to her expensive new school shoes that are drenched because she went outside to jump in puddles. In those shoes. Not the rain boots, because no one has seen the left rain boot since the day after you bought it. Hey wait, maybe the remote control is in the missing left rain boot!
Unfortunately, you’ll have to wait for the "9 Places To Look When Your Kid’s Rain Boot Has Gone Missing" blog post for help with that.
5) Under the front seat of your car. Wait, what? How?? Why???
6) Let’s hope it isn’t still in the bathtub…but last Tuesday your fancy Smart TV Remote Control did become a Duck Boat for your daughter's bath toys. Yay imaginative play?
7) The cat's food bowl. Right now is when you should pat yourself on the back for not switching to wet food after the vet suggested it last month.
8) Under the sheets, at the foot of your bed, your remote could very well be down there with the three pairs of mismatched fuzzy socks you kicked off in the middle of the last three nights. Mismatched of course because socks go missing in or around the dryer.
9) Your TV remote control is in the exact place it should be. Sure, that’s a possibility because, you never know, unicorns might be real and fat free chocolate cupcakes are totally a thing too.
OWTK is a paid contributor to Clorox's SpinCycle, helping you navigate the messiness of parenthood.